Category — How To

What are your goals? Landing that promotion, mastering that new language or taking a dream vacation? Use affirmations to lead the way.

Affirmations are powerful statements to remind us of our magnificent potential, despite what others may say or when our own ego plants that seed of doubt. Some people resist using affirmations. They think it’s too simplistic or that the practice is out of integrity because they are stating something that may not be true yet. Since all reality begins in thought form, affirming what you want to be true is the fastest way to get there.

Most people are inclined to think and say (to themselves and others) statements that prevent them from moving in the direction of their goals, like: “I’ll never make enough money or have a healthy relationship or lose those final 20 pounds.” Affirmations help counter that habit with constructive, supportive thoughts. The most effective affirmations are short, positive and in the present. You might choose affirmations that state what you want to achieve, like: “I love my healthy, slim body” or “I am a successful, respected business owner.”

Or you might use affirmations to focus on what is already true. Here are a few examples. If you want to be chosen for a supervisory position, your affirmation should include the qualities you possess that would serve you in that role. You might affirm: “I am a dynamic, empowering leader.” If you tend to wake up each morning wondering how you’ll ever get through your burgeoning to-do list, you might affirm: “I have more than enough time and energy to accomplish all my goals today.” If you are struggling with direction and finding the right resources to get the job done, you might affirm: “I am open to receive guidance and support.”

Commit to write down your affirmations and post them prominently—on your bathroom mirror, on the dashboard of your car and at your desk. Consider writing them at the start of every day to keep them fresh. Say them out loud throughout the day. Incorporate them in your conversations with others.

Here’s a tip I got from “The Secret.” To turbo-charge the power of your affirmations, add this simple phrase: “I am so happy and grateful now that…” When you combine affirmations with positive emotions, visualization and gratitude, you have a guaranteed formula for success in work and life.

Self-confidence

Just like anything else in your life, your self-esteem needs to be balanced.  Too little self-esteem can cause you to make poor decisions, settle, and not live life to its full potential.  Too much self-confidence and you may become arrogant.  Let’s be clear that not everyone who has an “ego” is necessarily self-confident.  Sometimes people with low self-esteem actually hide behind egos and deep down really have very little confidence.

Self-confidence affects every aspect of your life.  Everything from relationships with friends, family, co-workers, and romantic relationships can thrive from having the right amount of self-confidence.  Even if our bodies, diets, careers, and fitness aren’t where we want them to be yet, we can be confident on the way to achieving our goals.  For most of us it’s not having enough self-esteem that is holding us back, so let’s look at some ideas for improving our confidence.

1. Spend some time discovering who you are.

Make a habit of turning the TV and radio off if you don’t have a specific program to watch.  Often we don’t spend enough alone time with ourselves and our thoughts to even know who we are.  Spend some time answering the following questions and writing down your answers:

What am I good at?  List everything you are good at even if it’s something as simple as brushing your teeth.

What are my passions?  List everything that you love about life and what it is you want to be.

2. Think only positive thoughts about yourself.

We are our own worst critics.  We tend to be very hard on ourselves and think negatively about ourselves.  Start trying to pay attention to the thoughts you think and replace any negative thoughts with positive affirmations.  For instance, if you often think negatively about your weight, you can start thinking “I am thin and beautiful” whenever you catch yourself about to think negatively.  It will seem awkward at first, but it takes about a month to replace a habit, so keep it up.  Also take time to write positive affirmations in a journal about yourself every day.  Some of my favorites are: “I am in control of my life.” “I am strong.” “I love myself and who I am.”

3. Avoid toxic people.

It may be impossible to completely cut certain negative people out of your life, but minimizing the time you spend with these energy-vampires can be beneficial.  No one enjoys being criticized or dragged down into a whirlpool of negativity.  Surrounding yourself with people who are positive and encouraging can do wonders for your confidence

4. Don’t compare yourself to others.

You may look at someone and think they have something you don’t, but the fact is they may be looking at you and thinking the very same thing.  Someone may be better than you are at tennis, for example, but you can tell a much better joke.  Judge yourself by your own standards, for you are unique!

5. Learn from — but let go of — mistakes.
Absolutely everyone, no matter how perfect they may seem, messes up from time to time.  This is how we learn — like the process of learning to walk as children.  If we don’t stumble, we don’t learn how to keep our balance.  Keep this in mind as you venture out into the world.

6. Be thankful.

It’s impossible to be down on yourself and thankful at the same time.  Write out everything you are thankful for.  List everything from food to being thankful for the air you breathe.  Pull it out the next time you start to feel down.

7. Live in the moment.

The more time you spend dwelling on the past or worrying about the future, the more of the present you are wasting.  Life is NOW, and you should get out there and embrace it.

8. Find things you enjoy.

Whether it’s sewing, drawing, swimming or karate, hobbies are a big self-esteem booster.  Even if you are not an expert, doing something for the pleasure and challenge builds your sense of who you are.

Implement the simple tips above into your daily routine and you are sure to have bundles of confidence before long.  We are each in control of our own happiness.  A co-worker, love interest, or friend cannot take your happiness.  You can only give it away.  The next time a situation arises that gets you down and starts to strip your confidence don’t let it.  Turn to the lists you made, your affirmations, and go spend time with yourself!

Going somewhere?

Life is what you make of it.

We experience the same range of emotions, no matter our differences as individuals.  The outcome to any situation is a direct result of how we decide to handle it.

To help you ease some of the day-to-day tension, I have compiled a list of:

101 Ways to Manage Stress

(In no particular order)

1. Take 10 deep breaths.
2. Visualize a relaxing scene.
3. Learn to say “no”.
4. Stay clutter-free.
5. Read good books.
6. Stretch.
7. Write in a blog.
8. Try yoga.
9. Laugh often.
10. Watch clouds go by.
11. Look at a magazine.
12. Believe in yourself.
13. Prioritize tasks.
14. Get some fresh air.
15. Hug someone.
16. Get plenty of sleep.
17. Watch a movie.
18. Seek out positive people.
19. Make to-do lists.
20. Take a brisk walk.
21. Stargaze.
22. Sip a cup of herbal tea.
23. Put your feet up.
24. Enjoy a hobby.
25. Confront your feelings.
26. Exercise.
27. Plan ahead.
28. Talk with a friend.
29. Dance.
30. Laugh at yourself.
31. Count your blessings.
32. Be silly.
33. Set realistic goals.
34. Sing.
35. Squeeze a stress ball.
36. Eat right.
37. Take a nap.
38. Walk away.
39. Vary your routine.
40. Play with children.
41. Get a massage.
42. Ask for help.
43. Find a quiet spot to relax.
44. Take regular breaks.
45. Listen to soothing music.
46. See problems as challenges.
47. Smile.
48. Be faithful.
49. Avoid caffeine and tobacco.
50. Eat a good breakfast.
51. Cry if necessary.
52. Be flexible.
53. Play a sport.
54. Wear earplugs when it’s noisy.
55. Buy fresh flowers.
56. Spend time with loved ones.
57. Celebrate life.
58. Do one task at a time.
59. Meditate.
60. Plant a garden.
61. Avoid distractions.
62. Budget time and money.
63. Share jokes.
64. Play games with friends.
65. Look at the big picture.
66. Get up earlier.
67. Set limits.
68. Express your feelings.
69. Treat yourself to a gift.
70. Simplify your life.
71. Reflect on your joys.
72. Punch a pillow.
73. Go out to lunch.
74. Don’t dwell on the past.
75. Play with a pet.
76. Go to the park.
77. Take a shower.
78. Wear comfortable clothes.
79. Take off your shoes.
80. Forgive and forget.
81. Delegate work.
82. Love others.
83. Have plants at work and home.
84. Day dream.
85. Cook your favorite dish.
86. Savor meals.
87. Look at old photos.
88. Take a vacation.
89. Fly a kite.
90. Learn something new.
91. Volunteer.
92. Go out for frozen yogurt.
93. Join a group.
94. Rub your neck and shoulders.
95. Take the bus or carpool.
96. Have a picnic.
97. Recognize beauty around you.
98. Take it one day at a time.
99. Don’t procrastinate.
100. Make someone smile.
101. Think positively.

Make a positive difference in someones life.  Refer your friends and family to this blog.